Saturday, December 6, 2008

IM NOT TRYING TO OFFEND YOU

Morning again peeps, as I was burning pop tarts in the microwave this morning and smoke was filling the house, my children started running around laughing and looking for a way out, so they could breathe.

My phone rang and it was my dear mother whom I blame for every problem in my life. I told her to hold on and of course, she kept talking, so I just laid the phone down and yelled at my children to calm down! I got this, I screamed. It’s just a pop tart!

Anyway! I picked up the phone, all the time thinking of throwing it into the open dishwasher and hitting the start button, I grudging put the phone to my ear only to hear my mother ranting to me about how I needed to "carry my children to the house of the lord" she was worried about their souls! I could her inhaling her cigarette between breaths.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I said to her, (trying to be as nice as I could). Then a thought came to me. She started her conversation off with, I don't mean to offend you... and I am thinking the whole time, sure, you are trying to offend me, why else would you say that? And with that, I saw stupid!

There are people out there that start every sentence with - "I don't mean to offend you”,"no offense but. "No offense intended" but. - But my ass stupid~

Now listen stupid! If you start your conversation off like that, then already know that you are intending to offend someone, right?

Mr. C. has a better way!

I offend people everyday of my life. I am the king of offending people, and I see no need to sugar coat your remarks.

For future reference, shut up and say something! Say what you mean. This world needs truth! So stop being a politically correct wimp and do what I do.

Look at the stupid you are talking to square in the eye and bodily say to them:

I am about to piss you the fuck off!

And let it roll baby!

LOL...thanks mom...

Don’t be stupid!

MR CHICAGO SAYS YOU ARE STUPID

Morning peeps! I woke up this morning after watching a poltergeist marathon last night! It was cozy lying in the bed eating beef and cheddar sticks watching houses sink into the earth! LOL I wonder what ever happened to that little midget woman who brought Caroline back? Anyway, looks like McDonald's is back in the news! This time it is domestic violence! Imagine that.

INDIAN RIVER COUNTY — A Vero Beach man is accused of assaulting his girlfriend multiple times with a McDonald's cheeseburger, according to his arrest affidavit.

How in the hell can a McDonald’s double cheeseburger be considered a weapon of assault! I could see if it was a hammer, stick, or even a cell phone! But a cheeseburger! LOL

I would love someone to assault me with free cheeseburgers! LOL

You are stupid for choosing a cheeseburger as your weapon idiot! Did your mother not teach you that hitting little girls wasn't nice?

I wonder is she will sue McDonald's and get a new house?

LOL

Don’t be stupid!

Friday, December 5, 2008

DOES AMERICA CARE

Yes we do! Peeps! It sure took long enough time to finally get this killer off the street! OJ you suck! And should burn in hell for what you did! Have fun in the big house OJ!

I hope she is smiling right now! We love you Nichole!





Dont be stupid!

MR C AT A LOSS FOR WORDS HERE

Peeps! I'm sitting here browsing in the Internet, and what do I see? Tina Tuner in this getup! What in the hell is she thinking? All I can say is Dammmmmnnn! LOL

I think Tina is awesome! I love her music, her life and everything else! But Tina, Comon now, what the hell? LOL

I may not be as big as Tina (yet) but please Tina take Mr C's advise. You have no need to wow people! You are a legend Tina, your very presence on stage is enough, with a clear shot of those legs of course!

Only one person in the history of music can get away with this Tina, and that is the one and only, most awesome, sexy, and beautiful Cher, my wife...Love you Tina, but please no more! LOL


Dont be stupid!

YOU CAN HAVE IT ALL-SUE MCDONALDS

Update on my daughters dating status. This morning I was in the DMV office waiting patiently for the stupid people who work there to call my name. Snotty children running around everywhere made me wish I had brought my hand sanitizer with me. I just sighed very heavy and cranked up the IPOD.

Suddenly I jumped at the cell phone vibrating in my pocket! What now?

It is my daughter texting me from third period. Dad she says, "I have a new boyfriend, he is from Norway." Peeps this child is going to drive me more insane than I already am. How many more of her boyfriends am I going to have to destroy? I will keep ya posted.

However, right now I am going to Wal-Mart and buy a prepaid phone. Then I am going to upload a bunch of pics from the internet, of course claiming that the pics are my girlfriend.

Then peeps, I am going to leave the phone in the McDonald's bathroom and see what happens.

I saw a house I wanted...And need money to pay for it.

Later Peeps
GJ


Don’t be stupid!

LEGAL ASPECTS OF I SEE STUPID PEOPLE

What up peeps? Just sitting here checking all the e-mails that I received while hanging out with murderers, rapist, street thugs, and stupid people! I am off for three days, and I am scratching my head thinking, "Why do I have to work at all?

Hell I'm famous" LOL....Anyway...

There are people out there that have left suggestions about what I am doing, some think that I am cold hearted and mean. Some think I am funny. Some think I am insane, and some think that I curse too much in my writing. So I will take all that under advisement and attempt to give the people what they want.

This is an Official disclaimer for I SEE STUPID PEOPLE:

This website is private and confidential and may be legally privileged. It is intended for recipients only can appreciate that humor and laughter that makes the world go around. It is not intended to be relied upon as fact, as it is the writings of an insane asshole who likes to laugh alot- especially at stupid fucks!

If you are offended at the "language of I SEE STUPID PEOPLE, then get a life dumbass, it's the way we Americans talk! Blame your mothers, not me. Words and thoughts that have absolutely no meaning whatsoever sometimes fall out of my mouth, and end up on this website. BE WARNED.

I do not guarantee any information that is linked from this website, as I did not write every article on the damn internet. My sole purpose is to expose the stupidity on life. If you don't like it: Leave

I SEE STUPID PEOPLE should not be used on concrete.

I SEE STUPID PEOPLE should not be read by children under 10, pregnant women, or the elderly. As sudden cardiac arrest, or premature birth may happen due the sudden burst of laughter. And your children may start at ask you why to alot of what you are teaching them.

I SEE STUPID PEOPLE may cause

  1. Slurred speech.
  2. Loss of balance.
  3. Uncontrolled bowels movements or farting.
  4. Sweating or temporary blindness.
  5. The need to pray.
  6. Dizziness, vertigo, or itching.
  7. Seizures
  8. The need to walk up to a stranger at Walmart and slap the shit out of them.
  9. May cause one to accelerate at high speeds when driving behind stupid asses.
  10. The desire to stop at McDonald's and leave your phone in the bathroom just to see what happens.
There you have it peeps. Live it.
Don't be stupid

And in the good words of Kathy Griffin-Want a law suit? Bring it bitch, I'm lawyered up!

MR C IS LAUGHING SILENTLY....


Let the games begin peeps! I am back!


Dont be stupid!

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

BE BACK THIS WEEKEND PEEPS

Peeps! Working at the big house, lots of hours, be back this weekend! Would love your comments, suggestion, concerns! But most of all.....
Dont be stupid!

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

CANT HANDLE THE HEAT, STAY OUT OF THE FIRE

New roller coaster in Ohio.
Mr, C wants to ride this. Just remember to piss before you ride stupid

Don't be stupid.....LOL

MY PLAN TO FIX IT ALL

Total bailout money from the government in bailouts? 8.5 trillion dollars! Less than 5 percent of that went to everyday people! It went to company's and CEO's. Imagine that peeps! 8.5 Trillion dollars! Mr C. wants to go before congress and humbly ask the United States Government for a stimulus package for every hard working American.

  1. Free Heath Care for everyone.
  2. 1 million dollar per person that is a working citizen of the United States.
That would be cheaper than 8.5 trillion dollars to company CEO's to pocket! Don't be stupid!

FORD CEO IS STUIPID

BREAKING NEWS PEEPS!

The CEO of Ford Motor Company has just told congress that he will work for 1$ a year! LOL

How stupid do you think we are asshole! You will just live on the millions you already have in the bank. The millions you made by cutting your workers short, and taking from the company. Your an asshole! It makes me regret that I drive a go- cart made by Ford aka..... the Ford Focus.

The caption is my rendition of what the CEO of Ford Motor Company has been doing for so many years with the profits from Ford! Greedy Bastard!

And now you want us, the taxpayers to bail your ass out! GeeZ Where is Hillary when we need her???

And I would agree to work for free if the government would bail me out at say 1 million dollars???

FORD CEO YOU ARE STUPID!~

Dont be stupid!

I HAVE A QUESTION



DO YOU SEE HOW THINGS WORK NOW

Today’s news that we’re now officially in a recession and have been for a year may come as no surprise to those of you who have been reading newspapers, watching TV, or had a conversation with another working American in the last few months.

Latest news peeps! We are in a recession! Imagine that, who knew? I wonder if they knew this information last week when all the stupid idiots went out and spent all there savings on Black Friday Specials!? I predicted this and to those who listened and still have some cash for a rainy day! Great! To those who fall victim to the United States Government! You are stupid!

Why did they not release this news last week when stupids were trampling the walmart worker to death to get an LCD TV?

The retail executives raped all you peeps! LOL, I told ya so! I told you people to stay home and save your money! LOL You are stupid!

For future reference, Mr C knows everything! LOL
So, how much more money are you going to give to them today!

I read the front page of my local paper today, and it's sad that 400 people are losing there jobs. A factory near where I live is closing down. That's alot of jobs peeps! 400 family's without an income! Imagine.....Let them all know how you feel!

Stop giving them your money!

Until next time peeps!

Don't be stupid!

EVERYWHERE WE GO, PEOPLE WANNA KNOW

Morning peeps! I must say that it is as" cold as a witches titty here in stupidville" LOL, I just woke up early to get these kids on the bus so I can run around the house naked listening to my newest fascination from the 80s, Heart! How I could have missed this awesome music back in the day is beyond me. Lanie Pope just looks so drunk this morning on the news, I think she may be an alcoholic! LOL.

Anyway, I will stop ranting and proceed to tell the story. Now, I love Myspace as much as anyone, I have met alot of nice people on Myspace. I have met young, old, ugly, pretty, smart, and yes stupid. It's all good with me because it takes diversity to make things not so boring in life. I get random e-mails that have no meaning (such as this site)- and emails that can make a grown man cry. I get comments, some nice, some long, some stupid, and some big.

I mean where else can you go and get kissed, hugged, play with other peoples pets, exchange family photos, have a cyber drinks, and let everyone on the planet know what you are doing at any given moment through bulletins and status messages.

I had this one Myspace peep that would change status messages every 15 minutes, I mean you could set your watch by this person. At the grocery, changing clothes, drying hair, watching TV, picking my nose, ouch, I just farted! LOL Yes, I am serious peeps. It became so comical to me that I had to just delete them. I became addicted like my mother watching soap opera's when I was a kid.

Shit! Look at how long this post is, the older I get the more I ramble! LOL. I said all that to say this. Last night I tryed my hand at a Myspace survey. I get them almost daily, and I have yet to figure out what they are supposed to be, I mean, am I going to get paid for submitting them? Am I going to get the prize behind door number 3? Am I going to be on TV if I have the best Myspace survey? I really don't see the point, but I did it peeps! Its called, getting to know me.

So here is is peeps! Everything you ever wanted to know about the famous guy that's behind this stupid blog! Whatever joy you get from this let me know, as I am still trying to figure out the why, behind Myspace survey's.

Don't be stupid

Monday, December 1, 2008

MR C LIKES IT WHEN HE IS RIGHT

Evening Peeps...Just an update on an earlier post about someone dating my daughter. To avoid and confusion and possible lawsuits, I will name no names. LOL

Someone who I will call just "stupid" was dating my daughter. I did not not have much use for stupid because #1 he did not fill out my application to date her! #2 when I investigated stupid’s my space page, I noticed several references to gang activity, not to mention the random drug use, and the piercing!

Now before you send me a million e-mails about first amendment rights, let me say that although you may be able to be what you want, say what you want, expressing yourself by scaring up your body for the rest of your life; I have every right to NOT allow that kind of stuff in my corner of the world. Stupid, you are stupid.

Now almost two weeks later, my beautiful daughter informs me that stupid had two girlfriends at one time! Imagine that! LOL despite the sudden urge to tell her (I told ya so), I did not. I just incognito went to my computer to write this post! I love being a dad, as I am so good at it.

Stupid was stupid, and well I am smiling tonight. I was secretly emailing stupid, just to try to get inside stupid's head, so when It came time to break him down, then I would have all the ammo that I needed.

Therefore, here is to you stupid! You can have your drugs, and your other girlfriend, and your sick looking body piercing, and your redneck gangs buddy's who will more than likely end up sitting in the big house. However, what you will not have is my daughter! LOL

And to all the parents who think it is more important to be your child's friend and stay out of there business. I am here to tell you that you should be in your kids face all day, everyday, talking and inquiring as to who they are having affiliations with.

I am not my children's friend! I am a father! A job I am doing very well, if I must say so myself.
Later Peeps!
GJ
Don’t be stupid!

OBAMA AND HILLARY

So glad peeps! Something to smile about! She should have been Vice President!
Dont be stupid!

DRUNKEN BIRDS

Peeps, it is truly amazing what a little sleep can do for the stupid radar! This weekend I could not have seen stupid if it ran up and bit me on the nose, but this morning I woke up and I see stupid people everywhere! In my emails, on myspace, in the news! It is everywhere! I love it!

As soon as I got up and started watching the weather I began to laugh compulsively at the local weather lady here in stupidville.

She is always chipper in the mornings, I think she may sleep 20 out of the 24 hours in a day! She is a nice lady I suppose, but every time I see her, I just begin to laugh my ass off!

You see peeps, she looks like a drunken parakeet! LOL

Oh my, I am going to hell peeps! But you have to admit! Lanie looks like a drunk bird! LOL

We really do love you Lanie! LOL


Dont be stupid!

IS YOUR BABY IS GAY?

Morning peeps! Been a rather long weekend working up at the big house all weekend. Sorry no post for Saturday and Sunday, I thought I would lay low after pissing off a few people with redneck comments, and the stupid ass who is suing McDonald's! NOT!

Yall know me! I don't give a rat ass about any of nasty comments that the lady kept sending me defending the man's position of the lawsuit! Ok! (note to self Mr. C) New subject! New Week!

Sigh, Ok: I received an e-mail from a I see stupid people junkie last week and I have been waiting patiently to post my comments as well as the news article. Click here to read the e-mail.

Some people are just born freaking stupid! This dad thinks his baby is gay for various reasons. Here is the list.

  1. The baby, when crawling across the floor sways his hips!
  2. Sometimes when he plays peek-a-boo, the child wets his diaper!
  3. The baby smiles at strangers in excess at Walmart! LOL
  4. And the baby has an interest in bright colors, and things that sparkle!
Now I don't know if I want to laugh my ass off, or get pissed and tell this stupid ass what I really think of his stupidity.

I cannot imagine what it is going to be like for the poor child growing up with this stupid person!

I would imagine that this father has had some experience in things of this nature in the past, present or in his dreams! LOL!

Mr. I think my baby is gay- YOU ARE STUPID AND NEED THERAPY.

Dont be stupid!

Template by - Abdul Munir | Daya Earth Blogger Template