Peeps, it is mid-day and cold! Sammy and I drove to the store to get diet m.t dew, and a beef and cheddar stick. Well as I was checking out, a friend walked up behind me!
(Have you ever noticed that when you are in line at a gas station that there is always someone behind or in front of you talking on a cell phone, totally ignoring the cashier?
Well this friend turned out to be one of my cousins that I had not seen since my grandmother's funeral in January. Well to make a rather long story short, she was talking to her mother- who is my aunt! This woman is on every kind of Psychotropic drug that has ever been marketed.
Well of course, you can imagine that the phone ended up in my hand, everyone wants to talk to MR C! Whatever! I took the phone and noticed that there was a build up of earwax on the earpiece! And yes, I said it, Earwax.
Well you all know me, against my better judgment I instinctively said, "what in the hell is that" and pointed to the miniature dog pile covering the little earpiece.
I asked kindly how I could put the speakerphone on, because I was not getting that shit in my ear! So picture this peeps, I mean really picture it. Me, the speaker phone, with the volume wide open, and what does my aunt say in front of the now 10 people in line waiting for me and my cousin to move?
I said, "hi how are you, haven't talked to you in like a year"
She says "well you know, I don't get out much"
I said, "yeah I know"
She said to me right there...."you know that the world is going to end soon, we have a black president"
Yes, peeps! I almost shit all over the place as everyone looked at me in utter amazement in that gas station! I cannot get enough words together to tell her how stupid she is! I mean what in the hell are people thinking? Is she just stupid, or does she really believe that?
Man now I have to take a nap! In addition, peeps listen up, look at your cell phones right now, and inspect them for wax build up! It is nasty, and well just stupid.
And once you are done with that peeps! Go and clean your freaking ears!
Our mothers, no matter how whacked out they are, always told us to clean our ears!
Do it peeps!
Now I am going to enjoy this beef n cheddar stick with Sammy. She is pissed at me because I just cleaned her ears!
Don't be stupid!