Friday, December 17, 2010

My First Dictionary ...On Crack..

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My First Dictionary ...On Crack..

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My First Dictionary ...On Crack..

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Word for the day? Patient and Patiently!

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In my search for only the BEST in comedy I have stumbled upon this website called My First Dictionary! I mean who does not remember this! It is great and I will be featuring some of their work on my site! I hope you can see the humor in this! Thanks to the Folks over at My First Dictionary!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

What is a powder puff?

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Melissa Gilbert "Laura" I call BULLSHIT on Miley Cyrus!

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Miley Cyrus was partying with some friends and seen here smoking a bong.  November 27th, 2010

The former "Little House on the Prairie" star talked to AOL News in an exclusive interview about Cyrus' claim that she was smoking salvia out of abong, after video captured her inhaling what some assumed was an illegal substance.

"That's bull----!" Gilbert said. "I think it was marijuana."

ROCK on Melissa! Tell it girl!


Funny Facebook status messages - At night, every car that drives behind me automatically becomes a cop car.

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says I am getting more sensitive the older I get. I realized this today as I sat on a park bench throwing bread crumbs to the old people.

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Western Digital WD Elements 2 TB USB 2.0 Desktop External Hard Drive WDBAAU0020HBK-NESN

What the HELL you looking at Bitch?

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We get DRUNK, give the PEACE sign, Snap a pic and throw it on Facebook hoping that everyone will think we are cool.

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You Decide...

McDonald's: Behind The ArchesMcDonald's: Behind The ArchesMcDonald's: Behind The Arches


Funny Facebook status messages - pretty damn sure that Starbucks clearly has no idea we're in a recession.

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Coffee People, Donut Shop K-Cups for Keurig Brewers (Pack of 50)

says The longest sentence known to man: "I do.

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Glee: The Music, Volume 4

Only the best Facebook Status messages - has just realized there's a website that you can search for all the sex offenders that live within 25 miles of your zip code, check it out!! www.eharmony.com

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Jokes Every Man Should KnowDirty Jokes Every Man Should KnowStuff Every Woman Should Know

Santa Claus Facebook Status message - Santa Claus says When Chuck Norris pokes you on facebook you die!

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Pride And Prejudice

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Going Postal really means GOING naked. What a way to lose your job and look like a fool at the same time.

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WHITEFISH BAY, Wis. — A Wisconsin postal carrier says he simply wanted to cheer up a woman on his rounds who seemed "stressed out" when he decided to deliver mail in the buff. But upon further review, the worker told police that delivering mail while completely naked probably wasn't a good idea.

Go to fullsize imageA police report says the 52-year-old man told the woman he would deliver the mail in the nude to her office in Whitefish Bay to make her laugh. The report says that on Dec. 4 he brought the mail wearing only a smile.

The mail carrier was arrested for lewd and lascivious behavior several days later. The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel says the man admitted delivering the mail naked was a stupid thing to do.

Mr. C thinks that there are better ways to "score" than getting "Butt ass naked while on the job" What a Douche-bag.

Funny as HELL Facebook status messages -Why is the "Dont Touch my JUNK" person NOT Times Magazines Person of the YEAR? Pissed...

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Funny as HELL Facebook status messages - Hey Astro Glide! Your product is great, but the after effects is just a little "sticky" work on that please.

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Astroglide Glycerin & Paraben Free, 2.5-Ounce Bottles (Pack of 2)

Mark Zuckerberg named Time 'Person of Year' Sara Palin is PISSED!

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NEW YORK — Facebook founder and CEO Mark Zuckerberg has been named Time's "Person of the Year" for 2010, joining the ranks of winners that include heads of state and rock stars as the person the magazine believes most influenced events of the past year.

At 26, Zuckerberg is the youngest "Person of the Year" since the first one chosen, Charles Lindbergh; he was 25 when he was named in 1927, Time said Wednesday. Zuckerberg beat out Britain's Queen Elizabeth II by just two weeks: She was 26 when she was named in 1952.

Incidentally, Queen Elizabeth II has recently joined Zuckerberg's social networking behemoth.

Sara Palin is reportedly held up in Alaska mad as hell- Media reports from Alaska report that she has not bathed in a couple days and Glen Beck has been seen coming and going from the compound with JUGS of Jack Daniels.

In late breaking news Kanya West was seen consoling her at the local pub there in Alaska. "She deserved to be MEDIA WHORE of the YEAR he told reporters. Seems that the Palin FAM has a LOSING streak no matter how much bullshit flows from there mouths.

The Losers (Book One)Loser




Pot Farm on Facebook the most addictive game on Facebook...

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I have always been a person that say's LIVE and let LIVE, but this new app on Facebook has even me scratching my head. It's a POT FARM. Yes you guessed it- You can not harvest, grow, buy, sell and trade POT all legal right from the comfort of your own home.

And I thought Farmville was addictive. Sure Barb is going to love this one.


Wonders just how far social gaming will go? Will there be a "Slut" Ville? "HO" Ville, "Ghetto"Ville? Hey what about "ARE YOU MY BABY"S DADDY VILLE? 

Hey go ahead and add your Boss for this app!

Monday, December 13, 2010

12/2010: Wall Street Bonuses reach new record 144 Billion!! US Economy declared healed by Congress!

Washington, AP:  Members of Congress have declared the economy has completely turned around, just in time for the holiday spending.  They also said their handling of the recent bank fiascos on wall street a resounding success, as confirmed by bankers getting their biggest bonuses ever this year-- to the tune of 144 billion dollars.

To commemorate the economic turnaround, congress has replaced all the body scanning equipment at airports with new machines.  There are no attendants, and it costs you a quarter to use the machine.  House Speaker Nancy Pelosi encourages every poor traveler to use the new machines instead of going for a pat-down.



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Winter Blast Follows Snow Showers Across Piedmont as Barb Starkey makes a visit to NC!

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Funny Christmas Facebook Status - was surprised to find a Christmas present from last year while getting the decorations out. The kids were all excited as I opened the box. What a pity it was a dead puppy

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The 99 Most Essential Christmas Masterpieces (Amazon Exclusive)

Funny Christmas Facebook Status - is wondering if unemployment will be sending me a christmas bonus?

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You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: The Classic Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder

Funny Christmas Status messages! I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster.

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Bar Whore - Angry DrunkWhore's Divorce

Smartass Facebook Christmas status messages for Facebook! To America's welfare recipients."Your welcome for a great year and a free Christmas".From the rest of us hard working Americans that work for hard your well being every day.

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Why Americans Hate Welfare: Race, Media, and the Politics of Antipoverty Policy (Studies in Communication, Media, and Public Opinion)From Poor Law to Welfare State, 6th Edition

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