Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Funny New Years Status!

GOOD MORNING EVERYONE! ...I'm passing this on because it worked for me today... to reach inner peace we should always finish things we start, we could use more calm in our lives during the hectic holiday season. I looked around my house to find things I'd started and hadn't finished, so I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Chardonnay, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of wum, an a box a chocletz. Yu haf no idr how fablus I feel rite now. Sned this to all who need innr piss!!!

The Black Mushroom

Day 17 - Last week at work me and my coworkers ordered out from Wing Zone and I got these fryed mushrooms and fell in love with them. Now all of you that know me KNOW that I am the worst cook in the history of single fathers BUT I thought I'd give it one more shot and attempt to make these things at home.

As the story goes I referred to my life coach (Barb) as to what I should buy to accomplish this task while standing in the isle at Walmart texting her. I had no idea what to buy. Anyway Barb told me to buy Planks breadcrumbs or some shit now I cant rememberbut i bought what she said along with WHITE mushrooms and a fresh jug of grease.

Once home my mouth was watering and my stomach acing to make and then devour these mushrooms. As the grease heated up I put the mushrooms in a bowl with an egg and some milk so the breadcrumbs stick to the mushrroms. I was going to use water until Barb texted the proper way of doing it.

Then I rolled the mushrooms in the mixture and dropped three or four of them in the grease- BAD BAD BAD. Within seconds the mushrooms turned BLACK- smoke bellowed out of the pot. At this point I decided that the temp probally was to high, so I turned it down and scooped out the mushrooms aka turds.

I then tryed again and to my surprise ALL of my mushrooms that I had dumped in the pot looked like a sea of TURDS floating in black grease- The grease even turned black, which I assumed was because of the breadcrumbs.

One day I will have a maid to cook anything my heart desires being that my love for FYRED mushrooms is NOT worth me getting locked up agiain (Marriage) anyway. That is the story of the BLACK MUSHROOM.

Merry Christmas!

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

The New Facebook Timeline! What a MESS!

Now that Facebook is starting to unroll it's new timeline it will be interesting to see just how many marriages are destroyed over this one! They have STORED everything you have done since you signed on with Facebook and all that info is now logged as your timeline!

Every photo you have looked at and "liked", every story, every comment, every web page, EVERYTHING! They say that this life altering info can only be seen by you, but who believes that? I don't! Just one glitch over a window of time and EVERYONE can see EVERYTHING you have ever done while on this INFO collecting website!

But the real question here is WHY did Facebook do this? To what end will this be? Will they OR ARE they already selling all your private info to corp America? Could it be that they are classifying "groups" of people for mass extinction? That's probably out of the ball park, BUT HEY, its a strange new world we are living in.

Im so glad that I have only posted CRAP on Face book for three years as well as FALSE info! They can publish all my stuff, as I dont care! But to the unsuspecting- I feel bad for ya! And who gets the last laugh? FACE BOOK! You can't delete your profile! LMAO- you can just deactivate! All the info is still there and will be stored until the time is right!

Time to rethink what you are doing online. Will probably have to go back to the dark ages of bathroom and magazines! 

Good Day Fools!